Hard stuff happens to everyone. No getting around it. To a greater or lesser degree, absolutely everyone will face challenges in their lifetime.

How we respond to the hard things matters. Coping skills are as varied as the people employing them. Some are healthy and some are not, some are more effective than others.

I have a vast array of coping strategies, from expressive language, to sarcasm and dark/cockeyed humour, to art, to cooking (and eating) delicious foods. There is the escapism of reading, the healing nature of…well, nature. There is learning new things or conversations with interesting people.

Any and all in combination have helped when things get hard. I didnt put prayer on the list because I dont personally see that as a coping skill. Mostly, that is more in the way of a lifeline. Something to cling to WHILE coping skills are employed.

I have been surprised (and rather horrified) to meet several people in my life who just don’t seem to have any coping skills, or who have only negative ones – such as indulging in violence or addictive behaviours. I have to wonder how one reaches adulthood without developing a few. Have they simply been sheltered from hard things in their childhood? If so, such sheltering certainly did them no good and significant harm. Have they never had a positive coping skill modeled for them?

We have hard stuff happen here. Like a lot. Like, chaos is the name of the game more often than not. And while I certainly can’t say I like it that way, and it definitely sucks when in the midst of it, nor am I incredibly sorry about it. There are plenty of opportunities to practice coping skills, and to model them for the kids. And, having gone through the hard things, one is usually somewhat the better for it in some way on the other side.

Plus, the good stories never come out of “so there I was, having an awesome day and everything was awesome”